I was lost but then I was found,
Amazing Grace how God keeps finding me.
1) How He found me during my
early teens
In search of my own faith, when I
was 13 years old, I did explore other key religions like Buddhist, Islam,
Hindu, Atheism. But in the end, evidences and facts point to Christianity as
the most logical to me. I did not have a very complicated mind then but I just
needed answer that I could live on :-
- Muslim believes that at the end of life, only during the judgement, all the sins and goodness will be added up and you only know by then if you make it to heaven. They explained that is like a Big Exam in your life, you dont know the result until they announce it. But I thought to myself, if this is a Big Exam that affects my life, I need to have high confidence that I will pass and pass with flying colours.
- believes in many gods, a lot of gods. Hindus believe in the doctrines of samsara (the continuous cycle of life, death, and reincarnation) and karma (the universal law of cause and effect). I find reincarnation and karma very unfair. How could I be responsible for my previous life which existed long ago before my own conscience came into being?
- Buddhist believes in reincarnation and this is one area that I find it hard to accept. Furthermore, there is no god in Buddhism, who actually decides after this life, one be a cockroach or a dog or a beggar or a prince, no one knows.
- Atheism is the easiest for me to reject for the proofs having a Godly creature is more than there is no god.
I find the most attractive part of Christianity is in what Jesus has said to us in John 10:10, I have come that they may have life, and have it to the FULL. To have a life that is in abundance gives me sense of purpose and meaning and hope.
So by 14 years old, I accepted
Jesus Christ as my personal Lord and Savior. I desired to serve Him wherever I
can. God met me and found me searching for the truth and I made Him my savior.
2) How He found me during my
twenties
I was doing some evening Bible Classes
and I took up Systematic Theology - Systematic theology is a discipline of
Christian theology that formulates an orderly, rational, and coherent account
of the doctrines of the Christian faith. It addresses issues such as what the
Bible teaches about certain topics or what is true about God and his universe.
So one day, our lecturer asked us to answer this question:
Is God a Point or a Line ?
One view is God is not within our
time, but he is within his own time. In this view, God's inner life is sequential
and, therefore, temporal, but his relation to our temporal sequence is “all at
once.” In a sense, God has his own time line. He is not located at any point in
our time line.
I could not decide whether God is
a Point or A line and then I broke down before the Lord, "I do not care if
you are a point or a line, the point is I will follow you and with my life, I
will serve you."
This is where God found me as I
was trying to understand more about Him.
3) How He found me during my
thirties
In my late thirties, I had my 4th
child, a girl after 3 boys and I felt my life as a mother was complete, my
career was doing well and I was supposed to be happy but I was not. Something
was missing in my life. I joined the church workshop on "From Success To
Significance" and realised that I had a calling, made a promise to serve
God. At first, I thought my ministry is my own family, my children. But it
seems that God has found me feeling lost again and he pointed me to a journey
of service. I went to serve in the Girls' Brigade Ministry and have been since
2006.
4) How He found me during my
fifties
Now I am in my fifties, unwilling
to retire, so much I want to give and continue to serve but now my health is
not that good. I need to be found by God once again. May He comes to find me
seeking for way forward.
