Dealing with young death

There is always a first time for everything under the sun. I have been to dozens of funerals at various stages of my life since 26 years old. Prior to that first funeral I attended of my classmate who was same age as me, I had only attended my grandparents' funerals. But, this was to be the death of a young life, so young, only 15 days young on this earth.

Death is never welcomed at any home. Its mysterious and lonely feeling.  To the loved ones, it is the entire world caving in upon their lives, there is no way to run, no place to hide. To those surrounding them, we watch as they grieve in pain, suffer in silence, we cry along with them.

I have vivid memory of most funerals I attended, some I forced myself to attend, I do not know the deceased but I happened to be there and I knew the sibling and I had to force myself to go and pay last respect. Some were closed relatives and friends and I remember these funerals details, even the weathers of those few days of mourning.

I am often tongue tight in funerals visitations. My stomach would be tied in a knot, my tongue felt twisted and words would fail me. Even when I have prepared what to say, I could not say them out at all. So in this case, I could at least put into actions what I could do for her, my little part.

Baby Grace is the first baby that I have the privilege to assist to prepare for her funeral and her final journey. To be exact, she was not 15 days old when she passed on. To me and her parents, she has been around for 33 weeks since conception. The relationship with her was bonding through feeling her kicks on her mummy's tummy. It was a very exciting and much to look forward journey and an incomplete one. I looked forward to "feeling" her kicks every Sunday at church and at GB. I am getting very fond of her and getting ready to cuddle a young infant again. Her parents are so ready for her. I am ready for her. The entire Home Group is so excited to meet her too.

It happened so suddenly that I could still remember the conversations I had about them going into the hospital on 4 May 2014 Sunday after GB meeting at about 6 pm. Nothing quite prepared for us for what is to come. Baby Grace was miraculously saved and born at 10:30 pm that same evening. She was 1.6 Kg and a good weight at 31 weeks. From that day, she has been such a strong fighter. So when she breathed her last on 19 May 2014 1:35 pm, sadness just choked me.

Yet, we choose to remember Baby Grace in her garden-like heaven. Grandma used to tell that babies only dream about playing in a garden. She will know no pain and has not learnt how to hate. She is perfect in every sense. She feels free and is free.

I will always remember you Baby Grace, and I promise you that I will help your mummy and daddy through this grief.

What a privilege for a few aunties and Brigade members to ready the Moses Basket for you, Baby Grace. The cloth bought was so perfect, the pillows so soft done by your mum and grandma, the flowers all arranged nicely. 

This is my first witness at a Sea Burial. Totally unprepared for it and the emotion is as calm as the ocean. To think that in ancient days, only heroes were buried in the sea. 

The flowers are such graphical illustrations of how human lives are here today and gone tomorrow. Nothing is permanent and forever except what belongs to the Lord, our spirits.

These balloons represent the freedom Baby Grace has received in her passing. She will rejoice and dance forever more before her King and Maker, her Heavenly Daddy will always be there for her. Yes, we will mourn and cry with her parents for a while and in a short while, we will rejoice and remember that her life is to be celebrated even though it was just 15 days young.